Have a Growth Mindset for Love (Step 2 of 5)



This is the 2nd in a series of 5 Steps to Soul-Stirring Love in 2023. Keep an eye on this blog for the other steps.

Why is a growth mindset for love so important? Great question, and we’ve got a lot to say about it.

The Impact of a Growth Mindset for Love

Dr. Lara Fernandez here. After over 18 years of coaching accomplished women to intentional love, it’s always so exciting to receive messages from clients like this one I just received recently:

Johnny and Lara!

I want to express my deepest gratitude to you and honor the blessing that you’ve been on my journey of stepping into this new chapter with the man of my dreams

Remembering when I first started this journey with you, I was so skeptical and wondered how it would work.

The process you took us through, that was held with so much love from you, is truly appreciated. I’d hear your voices everywhere: “Trust the process,” “Be kind to yourself,” “You deserve this,” and so much more. You helped me learn so many beautiful things about myself and how to cherish all the little (yet BIG!) steps to get to this place…SELF LOVE

I’m soaking in all the goodness of yesterday’s proposal and I’m excited for our next steps as we continue to create the life of our dreams together 💍

Damian is everything I ever imagined and more. The way he serenades me with his guitars (YES he plays all different kinds), making homemade Italian cuisine, always showering me with love, and just the way he shows up!

Thank you a million times!

Lots of love,


Ramona was a client of ours who had been hurt, betrayed, and lied to by men in her past. 

She started our signature program with skepticism and fear that it wouldn’t work for her. Because in her experience, nothing else she had tried had helped her.

Not the weekly therapy. None of the self-help and relationship books that littered her bedside table. And not the half-completed manifesting journal she started anew every year.

What Is a Student of Love

Believing that working with us would lead to the internal BREAKTHROUGH she needed to be available for Soul-Stirring Love and Marriage was a leap of faith, to say the least.

Ramona wasn’t just skeptical, she full-on doubted that it could work.

But the difference in her that I see with a lot of single women out there who are looking is this:

Ramona has a GROWTH MINDSET.

She LOVES personal growth and development.

She EMBRACES learning.

And she applied that mindset to everything in her life, and that is why she’s successful in whatever she pursues.

When she came to Johnny and I, the minute an opportunity came for her to receive our expert support and coaching, she WENT FOR IT.

Ramona became what we call a STUDENT OF LOVE.

Why this term?

Because a STUDENT has a growth mindset about whatever subject they choose to pursue.

The term “Growth Mindset” was made famous by Stanford professor and researcher Dr. Carol Dweck in her book by the same name. She did decades of research on what makes people successful in any area of life and this it what it all boils down to:

“In a growth mindset, people believe that their most basic abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work—brains and talent are just the starting point. This view creates a love of learning and a resilience that is essential for great accomplishment.” 

A Student of Love is a woman who embraces a growth mindset in her search for true, lasting love. She is excited to learn new skills, a new thought process and overall approach to being intentional in love.

With this mindset, you cannot fail. 

Why It Can Feel Counterintuitive to Adopt This Change

This means you’re going to need to be a REBEL against society’s push toward making your career your main focus of life. (That’s the first important mindset I wrote about in the 1st blog post of this series.) 

Society wants you to focus mainly on being a producer for corporations and organizations. They stand to gain a lot from you ignoring your inner desire for lasting love.

There’s nothing wrong with being successful in your career. But the truth is, you’re going to need to make learning and growing in love a super high priority. That’s because with all the distractions of technology and the shifting societal expectations of men and women, dating is just… harder.

You’re going to need to learn and cultivate new skills. That is what dating in the 2020s requires.

You’ll need to have a growth mindset for love to GET those new skills and be able to apply them!

So, are you ready? Ready to become a Student of Love and have that GROWTH MINDSET around learning how to date differently so that you can finally attract the man of your dreams this year??

Affirm with me now:

I am a Student of Love! I EMBRACE learning the skills I need to find the love of my life THIS YEAR!



Feel and acknowledge in your body what those words start lighting up within you.

So, Step #2 to intentionally becoming a soulmate magnet:

Become a Student of Love!

Discover what the next step is in this article, and if you missed the first step is, find it here.